Its 12:50 on monday morning just got done watching a great slate of games (anxiously awaiting my homie Skol’s Sunday Slate) and just before I could sneak my last br’s in and officially retire for the night I stumble across this savage video.
Please, for fucks sake, watch the video.
This is the Miami Dolphins O-Line coach Chris Foerster. From the looks of this video my dude LOVES shneef and haha fuck he just looks like a total wackjob. Incredible audacity to be filming himself vacuuming dust at a NFL office but the plug isn’t one to bitch about money content.
Truly unreal… if you’re a lazy fuck and didn’t watch it or watch it all the way through heres a quick transcript i totally typed out myself and didn’t jack from another website who was quicker to the punch – the GSJ is pretty much the first to report and cover this.
“Hey babe. Miss you. Thinking about you. How ‘bout me going into a meeting, and doing this before I go? SNORT There’s those big grains falling, but I miss you. I miss you a lot. SNORT What do you think? Crazy? I know, babe. It’s gonna be a while before we can do this again, because I know you’re going to keep that baby. But I think about you when I do it. I think about how much I miss you, how high we got together. How much fun it was. So much fun. Last little bit before I go to my meeting. SNORT You think? I think not. I wish I was licking this off your pussy.”
Mount Rushmore funniest quotes from this Monologue that should be engraved and shrined in every rehabilitation center across the east coast
1)”how bout me going into a meeting and doing this before i go?” *Rips large line of shneeferson*
-Look at his face.
Yeah ok guy go ahead to that meeting you look fine.
2)”But I think about you when I do it. I think about how much I miss you, how high we got together. How much fun it was. So much fun.”
-Mmmmm. Fun. Sex. Coke. Offensive line schemes. Fun. His tone is so funny he starts to sound like a molester. I wonder if this chick actually likes this creepy ass talk and decided to blow him up for the video because he didn’t satisfy her or something or if she posted this video purely because its weird as fuck and the world should see. its a toss up.
3)”I wish I was licking this off your pussy”
-Bam. Ends it with a shabaaaang. Obviously he has to say something sexual when he’s smashed three straight rails of snow sounding like a horny Jared Fogle on chat roulette with a pack of cub scouts.
4)”Last little bit before I go to my meeting. SNORT”
Don’t forget he’s going into a meeting lolol. He says this one with such a “Tehee!” vibe to it like he’s just a little kid goofing off. What’s lost in all this is Jay Cutler has been under duress all year and it isn’t all because he’s a lazy fuck who sucks at quarterback and steals paychecks & gives minimal effort (He threw for less than 100 yards this week even though they won. He shouldn’t be allowed to put this on his career record as a win. 90-some yards??? Fucking beta). We’re now discovering that Chris Foerster is partially responsible for Jay Cutler sucking cock. Foerster is half assing meetings when he should be getting the o line ready to protect betaJay. Or maybe the coke is enhancing his coaching ability to do that. I don’t know, the plugs into potski not Colombian marching powder, irregardless hilariously wild of Foerster to send evidence of himself hitting the slopes to some whore before a likely very important meeting regarding the protection schemes of the Miami Dolphins. Sidenote, uh.. how the mighty have fallen? This Dolphins o-line was once a prestigious staple of the league consisting of an honorable man and fellow goat Richie Incognito. The Dolphins o-line, a tragedy story as devastating as the impeachment of Bill Clinton.
I am now going to take the time to finish this article/blog/update on Chris Foerster with BREAKING NEWS that has not hit the internet ANYWHERE.
I, the Plug, of the GOAT STREET JOURNAL, have it on good authority per sources that the Miami Dolphins have made the decision to !!! FIRE !!! Offensive line coach Chris Foerster. The termination will be announced later on monday.
^^^FIRST REPORTED BY THE PLUG🔌, GSJ
- Odell crying is so fucking funny. I obviously wasn’t watching this fucking dumpster fire 0-8 matchup but I heard he cried too while healthy as fuck early in the third quarter??? Hahaha what? What in the fuck is that… you might be the most talented receiver to ever grace the field and you’re bitching hard enough at something to cry? Mental midget. Not the first time he’s cried too didn’t his fairy ass cry during one of his hissy fights with Josh Norman? The Plug is disgusted! What is with this salty discharge emerging from Odells eyes!!! And this pic of Odell crying after his injury needs to become the new Jordan crying face. Hahahaha the caption possibilities are endless.
- When Eli doesn’t lube up before entry
- When Jason Pierre Paul sticks his clubbed hand up your rectum
- When you walk into the locker room and see Ben Mcadoo suckin off a schoolboy
- hahahah that one was fucked
- Eagles look fucking nice. Wentz looks legit, and sexy. Defense is looking impressive, and their secondary hopefully is healthy soon and will be fresh. Worth noting the Cardinals suck a lot balls. A lot. Tough games coming up, gotta win on the short week at carolina. I will be getting FUCKED up thursday night. Hehe
- Did I forget to comment on the video of Don launching three point heaves with paper towels in Puerto Rico(i think). 😭😭Hilarious! this dude never stops – content content content. And he LOVES the GSJ – he knows its that legit shit! S/o to the Don!
- Gotta love Aaron Rodgers going into Dallas and breaking their hearts in the final seconds again. Even though a-Rodg is queer as fuck, I hate the Cowboys more than i hate Isis and so I have to shoutout Aaron and the pack for putting the Birds 2 games up in the east. Fuckin right bitches
Final thot is a shoutout to Nelson Agholor for believing in himself. When he hit me up this offseason for mental advice i told him to just stick with the basics. Fuck a lot of hoes and catch footballs and thats what he’s been doing and it is WORKING! Wentz believes in him I do too he’s playing great new number new Nelson I’m proud of my brother and friend. Go birds.
Again, I, the plug of the Goat Street Journal am first to report that CHRISTOPHER FOERSTER HAS BEEN FIRED FROM THE MIAMI DOLPHINS.